Deciding that you should be happy, that you deserve to get good things, that you can bring yourself out of a loop or a storm or a mentality or society that forsakes and hurts you, these are reasons to do so. Inherently deciding that you want to be energetic in the overwhelming face of exhaustion, is a valid, valiant, and profound reason to do so. It is because the opposite here, giving in or giving up, is not just complying with loss but actively defining yourself as lost. In action does thought matter, because fuckers can talk all they want but until something changes there’s nothing really there; just talking borders and enters crazy, the boring and sad and bad kind of crazy.
This is much simpler a concept than it is a delivery. Whenst one feels worthless, there’s mechanisms all interconnected with one’s worthlessness. Passing fancies of dropping your burrito or missing a sale or it raining on new shirt, fuck all that shit. Getting past little things, one step things, is a matter of grit and determination. But purpose and meaning get a human through hell and impossible. For hell and impossible are ideas in one’s mind first, therefore it is one’s mind working against the self. Deciding that one deserves better and is good, and is worthwhile, is creating a new turn in an ongoing story; is taking control of one’s mind.
Creativity is always the answer, and when it’s not then you’re calling me full of shit which is creative because its rebellion on its own; yeah that’s a cheap wrinkle of a trick but fuck you, it’s my blog and my koolaid works wonders. The creativity in willing one’s self to have worth is that one must create a sense of who they are in order for their story to flow. All stories need rationale, functioning character. If Jesus or batman suddenly started screaming the N word and pulled a magic phone booth out of their respective butts, their tales would be not credible as good stories. For you, for anyone, to not have worth in themselves is a response to trauma or abuse. For a story to have a main character, that’s how a person’s inner-narrative works, that doesn’t have worth or important will is to write a shitty story. Even woody allen flick’s main characters, depressing and neurotic and usually screwed up, have a sense of self-worth and chase their desire with righteousness; even if its pathetically. Give yourself self-importance as a character, you are the person that you have the most control over in this world. The person you can help most in this world, is you.
Taking the route of a pragmatic opportunist with the power of perspective and abundance on their side, its fucking vital to consider that this is the most grand stage of all. The most amazing parts of any story is never eating candy for a thousand years, the biggest and most exciting part of a story, what makes that story, is when all hope seems lost and the main character says,”No, Ive got this.”. So try to look at this moment in your own story from the readers eyes, step out of your head for a moment, and realize that when all hope seems lost is when most excitement is found. Knowing this can be boost you through bullshit.
So when the world feels bigger than you and you feel not even there, this is the moment of truth. Me telling you so is priming you to deal and respond to it; most fears are scary things and most scary things are unknown. Love the world by loving yourself and giving this world the best person you can give it, an actualized and self-validated person with their shit mostly together. Never underestimate babysteps, check your nuances and know that when you feel worthless it took a whole system to truly get you there so you need a fucking large scale overhaul, and check desperation dangers. This is your world, your will matters, your thoughts make up your universe.
