When people defeat you and you don’t confront it but let it linger, the psyche festers. Arguments, insults(offhanded or direct) are hurtful and even if you completely dismiss it from reality it is still taking place of compliments and affection. To fail is human. To ignore it and allow that defeat to go ignored while it stagnates and festers is absolutely stupid. No failure is too big to look at because that is the only way to become great is by dealing with the downs. As problems have happened and you have not decided what started them, what role you played, and how you want to feel after and if they arise again or how to never have them return, are all things one must address to decisively move their own life forward instead of drift, break and crumble.
Repeatedly fucking yourself will have the same results, every time. Patterns happen because a person makes them happen again and again. To be able to chart and track the same ways a person delusions themselves allows that person to stop refueling it. Change the groups you consistently find yourself involved in which don’t produce and treat you as less than you want to be. Change the outlook you take when looking for a next opportunity, romantically and financially and all else. Change your patterns that keep on producing crap, try something new and stick to it. Sloppiness gets one running back to familiarity of ease.
Letting yourself baste in shit… it can be friendships, relationships, family situations, houses, schools, jobs, cities, whatever. The place you are in should celebrate you and propel you forward. Clean up your workspace and make it suit you for the life you want to life. Leaving it dirty with bad people, stains, or whatever is accepting filth and despair as fit elements for your life; future and present.
The people around you aren’t always hurting you but you do seek what you know. So if you have found people who need the help which you so desperately also seek then you’ve collected a bunch of broken toys instead of a well rounded team of toy builders, engineers, shippers, and reindeer. The full packaged deal with way better because it gets to fly around and make the world happy instead of sit in piles and commiserate. Seek people who are great and work well with you, not who understand and mask your pain. Empathy is powerful and without growth it’s like the nicest medic on the battle field is coddling you while you bleed out your guts instead of stitching you right. As you seek the right people, so will the people around you who act as broken become likewise or start to display the characteristics of those who can help you. Groups work like that.
Being around helplessness and not being allowed to fix it is maddening and it leaks upon you. So common is helplessness from the heart because it comes from family. One who grows up not being told they’re awful but being around people who let themselves be awful and hurt and resent those who aren’t, is a person whom lives in an environment that breeds apathy and self-loathing then reinforces it socially. These people continually find themselves in similar relationships with work, love, and friendship because we go towards what is familiar. Leaving this seems like running away, giving up on people where in understood science of human nature it is only the logical course of action. People will not change unless they want to or they are forced to. A person can be showed a better path… you can’t force or chose to give it to them though. Also, if you are on the same grounds of them, you have no grounds to tell them to change. Changing yourself is the best way to help others you feel that you are being sucked in and pulled under by being associated with.
Measure the obvious things you can do right just to get that concept through a defeated brain. Turning on a light switch, find somebody who loves you on fb and remember that you make them happy just by existing. Think of things you HAVE done successfully. Name all the pokemon and their evolutions, recite poetry you memorized or books you read and understand, something of successful brain function you done did right. Get into that jig of the brain. Boogie with successful juices and let em flow onto whatever is right in front of you. It is very very easy to just run through twelve things you can do and ten you have done. The last few dozen thoughts on your mind create the emotional tone and expectations you have. Being stuck on shit and void of obvious successful truths will shit talk your mind into perspective depression. So arm your mind with the best ammo to fire the best directions you can have.
Examine the options fearlessly and excitedly. This is like refreshing yourself from being stuck in pond with all the waters available in the rest of the Earth. There is no down without an up and we find what we look for. Seeing the worst option and feeling one is the down to an up which means you can look to that up because freewill. Seek what you want and seek abundantly. The more you find is the more that is different, and if it’s all likewise then you are seeking with your head up your ass. Find some greats to follow, look at higher institutions of learning and great groups doing amazing things. Whenever you find a shitty feeling, ask what the opposite of it is. The world is not monochromatic and will ALWAYS be bigger than the human mind can comprehend. Never forget that, then pick the good you want to seek and go find a metric ton of it.
