The enemy is me, clears up aimless resentment and paranoia for folks who are constantly looking for something they’re convinced exists. The American culture is a good basis for a nemesis complex with the war we declare war on concepts and demonize problems instead of discussing them. A person’s biggest issues with having the nemesis complex is their conviction to someone being out to get them as a focus. Finding out who is out to get you, won’t necessarily fix your problem so it is a superfluous and fruitless ideal. It stems from a traumatic or intense background with sides and enemies where blame becomes identified with a person rather than a action or idea. As this concept continues and is not addressed, it becomes a common projection and assumption about most situations. This construct has a framework for failure missing places for helpful people and slumping irritating or occasionally hindering humans into slots and evidence of competition or treachery. Since all social frameworks have irritating people and enough ambiguous action to make this concept consolidated, one must find a new framework to replace it and understand the flaws and holes of the nemesis complex.
“If you can’t find the narc, you are the narc” is what the nemesis complex holder has in their backup plan emotional setting. As push turns to shove, think goes to assume and an old role assignments out weight in familiar than good ideas. That feeling of comfort in accepting people, be it the self or others, is out to get somebody is the key theme and the nemesis complex. Of course, that will happen occasionally… it is extremely rare though. Understanding people and allowing them the space, which means treating them as if, they will help you and that you’re both moving towards good and the same successful goals will turn them into allies. This still address the nemesis complex as valid though for it doesn’t dismiss the enemy and ally concept.
To dismiss that silliness, both examine where the concept comes from and how people work. When paranoia persist and irrational anger flows, presumptions about critique jump to perceived insults and attacks, the attacking of someone else does not eliminate the problem but garden it. The issue is in one’s own mind’s tick to seek out an enemy instead of improve and enjoy, the issue is seeking and expecting battle and pain instead of understanding and growing, the issue is the lack of progress not the removal of digression and resistance.
It is rather ridiculous and uneducated to assume you have enemies because psychologically speaking people are about themselves 95% of the time. Even romantic interests rarely have a larger steak in what others think. Disagree? Good! Now only use that as measuring tool for how much somebody loves you instead of how much somebody is trying to hurt you because THATS WHAT ROMANCE FUCKING IS. Nobody is out to fucking get you even though you can alienate, antagonize and treat people as such long enough to lose a friend. The idea that anyone cares about hurting or messing up others that much is overblown lunacy.
Your worrying is hurting you more than anything else, there isn’t a magic curse on you nor are you inherently flawed. All time spent worrying is an investment of energy and faith into failure. A small glance to check that your break cables are in tact, sure. Staring at them and tensing up like a crack-fiend,no. Cycles are made up, so make new one up. Its also blinding you and making fail as well as seem unsure which adds to social perceptions of you that could produce actual resentment and poor character perceptions.
You find what you believe in, keep believing in shit then you will find it while not having a smidgeon of faith in goodness and you’ll miss it. If heaven was a metaphor where you had to believe that it existed and rewarded those who were good then not believing in it would void its existence. Same idea, without allowing the idea of a good day, better option, happy person, kind boss or whatever to exist then even if it does happen to be present in life, you will miss it because you have hexed it out of your perspective. While the same is true the opposite way of shitty things but since this is a traumatic and emotionally triggered complex, it will back up the negative beliefs with negative emotions of fear and anger by blaming and incorrectly identifying wrong. Create the model for goodness in your heart and mind so that if strings of it show up you can follow them. Conversely, if one continues to follow shitty things then one will find shitty things. Even though it may seem like you are following the rabbit hole, you are in fact creating the rabbit hole.
Slippery slope arguments don’t solve diddlyfuck as not everything is connected. Everything would be simpler and easier and work obviously fluidly IF that one person weren’t around is a good example of how to think if you want to be an idiot. Catastrophizing things is not ever a good idea, the whole world works in small parts that correlate or occasionally cause each other. To find solution examine the details and theme, getting emotional or attacking the big picture is like masturbating without genitals.
The main theme here is seeking something to hurt as an answer instead of seeking something to love and trust. One’s fix is up for grabs, make a pick you respect.
