We find it so clarifying to communicate with people we care about by being honest and talking. But that is strategic instead of spontaneous and in mind instead of at hand. Ask with your soul, words are representations of ideas that have different meaning and reactive reputations that differ from person to person. If the behavior one is exerting doesn’t get the intended result than that behavior needs to be changed. Directly expressing one’s desire verbally can clarify things but it puts the mind at the front seat and puts the heart and soul in the back. Good sex, for example, can’t happen when totally planned and regulated and expected and on schedule. There is nothing real or exciting or new to it. Foreplay is the mood of the moment and if it is realistically intimate and playful by its behaviors, actions, and motions than it is good. But directing thing takes the heart out of it and makes it an expectation rather than a gift. If one wants something to happen, the best way is to imagine it happening and how they would feel. To imagine the person who has that happen to them. To ask inside your mind, to your god, to the universe how it would make sense happening. Then to start acting, feeling, and believing in that. Some cues may be helpful but directly saying so throws a halt in anything emotional because the mind is now in full control while the emotional tie is that of correcting. Love what you do and let yourself love, don’t force yourself or anyone you love.
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